Bathroom Bills Bungled With A Bathroom Buddy

@ashleysmithhair Instagram

Governor Greg Abbott of Texas has a pet bill. It’s yet another one of those anti transgender bathroom bills. The governor wants to ensure public bathrooms are for your assigned birth only. Abbott wants to punish transgender people by law if they are caught violating this law. He never factored in Ashley Smith and her now viral bathroom buddy photo.

Ashley Smith is a trans woman who recently went to one of his public appearances. There were protestors outside, but she went inside and got a selfie with him. It was easy to do because the governor saw a woman. That was all he saw, a woman. So he took a selfie with her and she put it on Instagram with the caption, “How will the Potty Police know I’m transgender if the Governor doesn’t?” and tagged it #bathroombuddy.

She has pointed out of the problems with policing bathrooms. We have to go by visual bias as to what is and is not a man or a woman. All of these evangelical bill proposers thinks they know, but they do not. They end up looking foolish in the process.

Trans People Who Pass

Ashley Smith “passes”. My son “passes”. Many trans men and women “pass”. To pass means that you look like the gender you identify with based on social norms and constructs. For some trans people, this is important. There are other transgender people who care less, like anyone, appearance is an individual form of expression.

Going to a public restroom is a normal event for my son these days. He walks in and walks out and no one takes any notice. Looking at Ashley Smith, I suspect it is the same thing. She walks in and walks out and no one notices. I would not be surprised if I have been to a public restroom with a transgender person in the stall right next to mine and never been the wiser.

Trans People Who Don’t Pass

There is one thing that sometimes makes me cringe a little when people point out how bad these bills are. They often use pictures of very masculine and well built trans men or very feminine trans women that could all pass for not only their gender, but for models.

There are many trans people who do not pass. Some do not pass by choice and others are not able to very well for reasons outside of their control. This is not just about visual appearance, this is about civil rights.

Earlier I stated that I have likely been to bathrooms with trans men and never known it. Conversely, I’ve once been in a washroom with a transgender man and knew he was transgender. Did not matter to me one bit. I did not notice anyone else take note of him either.

Cisgender Straight People Who Don’t Pass

There are straight cis women in the world who have small breasts and short haircuts. They may have chosen to not wear make up one day and dressed down in a t shirt and jeans and wear a baseball cap. They walk into a ladies room and they get followed by a man who assumes they are a boy and takes it upon himself to enforce bathroom “safety”. This actually happened in Texas.

Now to the men. Medications, age, and illnesses like liver problems or an overactive thyroid can lead to straight cis men to have visible breasts. Some men have “feminine” characteristics.

Gender Norms Are A Social Construct

We have created what is masculine and what is feminine. We have created gender norms that are based on clothing, hair, make up, presence of visible breasts and many other factors. Visual conformation of assigned gender is not only impossible, it is silly. The governor who wants to restrict trans rights who did not know his arm was around his “enemy”. Unfortunately, she did know.

Look, we all know that this whole issue is not about bathrooms anyway. It was not about bathrooms or water fountains during Civil Rights. It’s about hate and religious bigotry.

The person trying to go to the washroom is not scary. Men like the governor of Texas and North Carolina are.